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Learning experiences: I’ve had a lot of these over the past year, so much that it often overwhelms me into an incredible meltdown. In these meltdowns, I kick and scream and cry about how unfair this is that I am in the place that I am, how I wasn’t meant to be here, how I was supposed to be somebody by now (when I said “incredible” meltdowns, I meant it). These tantrums last anywhere from 15 minutes to 24 hours to a week; however long it takes for the wise and insightful words of my elders to kick in or until my mother’s shoulder is sopping with my melodramatic tears (thank whoever is great and holy for wonderful mothers, by the way). When I finally bring myself back to earth, I realize this is exactly where I was meant to be. Nobody said life was supposed to be easy, especially an extraordinary one which is what I am determined to live. The past few weeks have been filled with wonderful memories, hysterical moments, affectionate tears and painful anguish. A powerful growth period it was.
A wise woman who for the short time that I have known her has helped me to an indescribable amount once told me; becoming who I want to be is not going to be easy, nobody is going to be thrilled that I am standing up for myself. There will be obstacles along the way attempting to keep me from my place because I need to prove that I deserve to be there; that I was meant to be there.
Momentarily I was brought down to a bad place by somebody very unhappy. Momentarily, I was filled with hate and negative energy but this was not permanent. I needed this meltdown to ignite the fire beneath me. I won’t spend my time figuring who it was who felt the need to hurt me and several others because it is not worth it. Instead I will thank them for waking me from Limbo. I’ve already begun my journey out of it. |
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| Posted: July 23, 2010 at 1:06 pm |
Posted in: No Category | Comments (1) |
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| Wow, Allie! Something that could completely wreck a person is making you so much stronger! You have matured beyond your years and you can be very proud of that! You go! And Don't stop for anyone!!!
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| Posted by: MRP | Posted: Jul. 23, 2010 @ 1:54 pm |
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