AllisonMaddox.com

I envy impulsive behavior, yet every time I get the opportunity to act impulsive, I think logically and the risk that could have been the greatest experience of my life passes me by. I do not think I am a cowardly person, only incredibly anxious… all of the time. I say “what if” a million times in my head every single day and I’ve learned that these thoughts cause nothing but stomach issues. By the end of the day, I lay in my bed calculating all of the ridiculous possibilities that flew through my head which, in turn causes insomnia. This vicious cycle of self destruction has worn me down time and time again and I am tired.

I recently stepped out of my comfortable bubble of delusion and security and took a leap of faith on something as uncertain as spring weather. While something like this would normally freak me out and send me into hiding, I decided to take a hit and maybe get hurt. I did this because I realized while living in my security bubble, I was in fact protecting myself from life’s tortures, but I was also missing out on its greatest pleasures as well. I cannot heal without feeling pain, I cannot laugh without frowning first and I cannot experience life if I do not allow myself to do so.

I am about to do something very unlike me. Instead of letting this moment pass me by, I am going to take a risk, even if the end is potentially hazardous to my well being. I might come back from this experience broken and devastated, I might regret it at the time, and I might crawl back into my comfortable bubble for a while. All of these things MIGHT happen, but this experience might also be nothing but incredible… and that is the risk I am finally willing to take.

Posted: July 01, 2009 at 10:22 pm

Posted in: No Category | Comments (5)

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Posted by: Wholesale sunglasses | Posted: Jun. 14, 2010 @ 1:41 am

So what was the outcome? How did it make you feel? Was it worth it?

Posted by: Yellow L. | Posted: Jun. 15, 2010 @ 12:46 am

Great journey and experience!

Posted by: mbt tataga | Posted: Jul. 11, 2010 @ 2:28 am

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